Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Laughter is Good Medicine~ even at one's own expense!

For the sick and weary, read on. For those healthy and hale, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. (BTW, some dear friends have suggested that my self-deprecation is excessive. Thanks for your concern. I hate to tell you that this post is along the same lines. If you compassionate souls can't bear it, link to one of my more cheery friends ;o) Besides, I like to make others smile, even if they have a laugh at my expense.

With that said, I went to Winn-Dixie this evening with Alex. I planned to stroll leisurely through with my pajama-clad child, pick out a few necessities like Low-Fat Honey Graham Crackers, and head home. Kathryn MUST have graham crackers dipped in milk before bed, or the end of the world has come. When I returned to the parking lot, I noted a suspicious looking gent in a nearby car (you have to know that our area has an abundance of these). So I quickly loaded my child and groceries into the car, opened, closed, and locked my door in one smooth motion. As I prided myself on being so safety-conscious, I put the key in the ignition and turned. Nothing. Nothing at all. I ran through checking the radio, the lights, the a/c, the locks, still nothing. After about 5 minutes of checking through my options (and yes, I left the cell phone at home~ no hate mail, please), I realize that it is getting hotter in the car by the moment. Outside the car, it was 97 degrees, so you can imagine. I now realize I am locked in my sweltering car SOMEHOW with my baby, and we're going to die.

I threw my pride out the proverbial window and began banging on my own closed one. The only person I can see is a smoking, dreadlock-clad brother jamming out to his very loud rap. So HE couldn't hear me, obviously. Finally, after much banging and a good bit of prayer, I managed to attract the attention of someone (more blonde than myself). She promptly panicked, called 911, and began going through my trunk to open an air passage for us. She asked me about passing the baby back through the back seat to her, but I thought the air was enough, thank you. Just then, I think, "Did I MANUALLY try to unlock this door?" Quickly followed by, "Please, Lord, don't let it open!" But it popped right up, and I popped right out.

Then the uniforms began to arrive (due to above-mentioned 911 call). The first was more than generous and just kind of stared at me in shock. The second muttered under his breath, "HOW can you lock yourself in your own car?!" and sped away. So! Tonight, I am the topic of conversation over doughnuts and coffee at our local Hueytown Police Station. Blessings on them for taking care of us idiots. And hey, I needed the laugh. Maybe you do, too. ;o)

11 comments:

Julie Schultz said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Julie Schultz said...

Ouch! Sounds like you need a vacation. Do you think you have "brain overload"?

Misty said...

Wes and I are both laughing right now!

Mary Ellen said...

Hands down that is one of the funniest blogs I've ever read - maybe it's because it is so late but I have tears in my eyes from laughing!!!
Did you have to have BLONDE hair and do that...as if the jokes aren't bad enough for us blondies!?!?!

Charity, you are indeed, a total hoot! Thanks for ending my night with a good laugh.

Tara said...

Girlfriend, you DO need a vacation! What I want to know is, what was Nate's reaction to this fiasco?!?

Okay, I'm off to write my hate mail to a young mother for leaving home without her cell phone! :) Love ya!

Charity said...

What do you THINK his reaction was, Tara? He came and jumped me off in the rain, while I told him what happened. As soon as he realized his wife had been pounding on the window of her car from the inside, he disavowed any claim on me and the children and deserted us to our fate. Thankfully, he got my car running before that happened... He's been laughing at me ever since.

Holly said...

Wow! Bless your heart! Great story though! ;-)

Anonymous said...

Charity, I can't believe this! I guess I just picture you being the girl I knew in college who had it all together....always! It is so funny! I am desperately tring to bite my tongue on the blond jokes but I can't help but think...if only a brunette had come to your rescue, maybe she would have realized she didn't need to call the police! HE HE.....

Oh my goodness! To your defense though, Motherhood is tough! I have my "blond" moments too! :-)

Julia said...

I once locked my baby in the car, do you feel better? I also over poured the gravy into the gravy boat yesterday. I was watching myself do it and thinking, "Boy that idiot should stop pouring the gravy into that boat!" Thank God you were both safe anyway. If it makes you feel any better I've heard it is the highly intelligent who do these sorts of things. The "plain brains" tend to have enough extra space left in the many unused portions of their brains to think of simple things like manually unlocking the door.

Angela said...

A girl after my own heart....
This sounds like something I would do...
One time I was trying so hard to find my baby, I had everyone looking and finally my sister-in-law said, you are holding her. I immediatly turned every shade of red.

TheMan said...

Charity, that was hilarious! I heard about it from Danielle and I had to read it for myself! Thanks for sharing. I miss seeing you, your little chunky Alex, and my little ball playing pal, Kathryn!